110714 – let it be the last day?

I seriously don’t know if I can do it…I really don’t know..

Yesterday, I got mad at him, because I feel annoyed to heard him around…Sining keep asking me to be normal again. What does it mean by be normal? I feel that he being normal with Miguel, with Anthony, but never with me.

The past year, living with hope, I had the picture out. I knew walking out of it would be difficult. That time, it was like 3 years…the worse thing is, I never go out to meet people.

Today, I ran back to take a shower, yesterday I took two bottles of sparkling water, today, I went out with a scarf…but I don’t have courage to take it out.

no…I don’t think I can be a normal friend again… it’s impossible..
it’s true that once upon a time during the past year, I thought of it…but it doesn’t happen anymore…

there is a picture on his screen, I peeked…but, girls or guys…I have no right to know

if life can be a bit better…pls let it be a bit better…

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